Has this ever happened to you? You're on your period, you're tired and crampy, and you are about to reach into the fridge for your delicious little treat - because every girl on her period needs a sweet or salty snack - but only to find that someone had taken it for themselves. You don't know who, you don't know when, but you immediately have an urge to turn into a fire-breathing dragon and rip their treacherous head off. This happened to me just now. My stepfather took my last bit of chocolate frosting that I was saving for my dessert tonight, and I'm feeling rather irritated. Irritated enough to write a rant-and-rage blog.
There are special things that ladies require when they are "visited from their little sister," "riding the cotton pony," or "on their happy day," and when you take away those special pieces of equipment, you are left with one very unhappy camper. These are the 4 things you need to avoid taking from a woman on her period, or else suffer her literally bloody wrath.
1. Her Comfort Foods.
Why? Women get cravings for feel-good foods when they feel gross, tired, bloated, in pain, and we like to eat foods that will sooth us emotionally and psychologically, and will sing to our taste buds. We (men and women) associate fat and carb-filled foods with special experiences or being rewarded. And the most craved food or flavor, chocolate, contains chemicals that release endorphins in our brains causing us to feel happy. Once I had a presentation about chocolate and brought 5 different dark chocolates for the class and myself to sample. After sampling all of those rich dark chocolates, that afternoon I was skipping and leaping around campus and smiling at everything, in other words, I was high on chocolate. That was a splendid afternoon. Chocolate is perfect for a woman on a heavy period day. And the comfort foods are not limited to chocolate goods. It also includes foods that are salty, fatty, greasy, or anything that Sesame Street can label a "sometimes" food. Do not remove these from her fridge or pantry, unless you want your rear-end deep fried and smothered in melted chocolate.
2. Her Pain Killers.
Why? Well, duh, Einstein, she's in pain! Men don't understand what kind of pain we go through when we have cramps. Its like having someone with combat boots stand on your pelvis and lower back. Its like having a migraine in your nether region. If you want we women can simulate the pain for you by kicking you in your coin purse for a couple days straight. Are you shifting in your seats yet? Then always leave two or three servings of pain killer pills in the bottle so they are ready to welcome her with comforting arms on her first heavy day.
3. Her Pads or Tampons.
Why? Once when I was away at school I had the misfortune of having my entire stock of pads stolen from me, which I found out on a morning that my period started. After panicking for a few minutes with the fear that I would not be able to go to class because I didn't have any "protection," I did eventually remember with a self-slap to my forehead that I lived in an all-girls dorm, so surely someone on my wing could give me a couple until I could go to the store. My point is, if you take away the most vital equipment for a woman on her period it will be one of the biggest inconveniences she will experience in her lifetime, and could also produce embarrassment should she find herself out and about when her period suddenly starts, and discovers her emergency pad or tampon in her purse or wherever she keeps it is missing. This has also happened to me before. For the love of God, no matter whether you are a man or woman, do not take her pads or tampons without sparing her one for herself!
Why? Most of us women bloat when we are on our period. My sister, who is skinny as a twig (not literally, thankfully!) bloats so much when she is on her period it looks like she is 3 months pregnant. And when we bloat, of course, things start feeling a little tight in the waist band. We like to do anything to make us feel comfortable while we are suffering from our time of the month. That is why we like to switch from our skinny low-rider jeans or waist-line pencil skirts into our baggy slacks, sweatpants, or PJ bottoms. It is very uncomfortable when we have to sit down in skinny jeans or any other tight fitting pants (and lets face it, that is THE trend in pants now). Please don't be cruel by hiding these from us. We'd like bloating mixed with fitted pants to be one less discomfort during leak week.
Now, may I warn you again what happens when you do take these things away from a woman on her period? She can become irritable, emotional, uncomfortable, embarrassed, terrifying, and/or vengeful, and you WILL need to beg for forgiveness. It's not a very easy time of the month for us ladies. We very much appreciate when those around us are sensitive and considerate about what we go through; the cramps, the pain, the fatigue, the cravings, the discomfort, the raging hormones and mood swings, all make for a very hard few days. If you are a man in a relationship with a woman, it does give you major brownie points if you give her a few of her favorite candy bars or treat her to a burger and fries meal during her period. Hopefully this article will give you a little bit of an insight on how to treat a woman on her period. Trust me, there are more things to cover concerning a woman on her period, like what sort of things to not do since she is more irritable than usual at this time of the month, but maybe in another article I can cover that for you. Just remember to be considerate so we will want to return the favor when you are going through a stressful period (pun intended).
Now, may I warn you again what happens when you do take these things away from a woman on her period? She can become irritable, emotional, uncomfortable, embarrassed, terrifying, and/or vengeful, and you WILL need to beg for forgiveness. It's not a very easy time of the month for us ladies. We very much appreciate when those around us are sensitive and considerate about what we go through; the cramps, the pain, the fatigue, the cravings, the discomfort, the raging hormones and mood swings, all make for a very hard few days. If you are a man in a relationship with a woman, it does give you major brownie points if you give her a few of her favorite candy bars or treat her to a burger and fries meal during her period. Hopefully this article will give you a little bit of an insight on how to treat a woman on her period. Trust me, there are more things to cover concerning a woman on her period, like what sort of things to not do since she is more irritable than usual at this time of the month, but maybe in another article I can cover that for you. Just remember to be considerate so we will want to return the favor when you are going through a stressful period (pun intended).
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